February 14, 2012
Roles and Relationships
- Dependability, Responsibility, Reliability
- Being Happy
- A sense of humor; to be able to laugh at oneself
- Exclusive intimacy
- Watching movies (Romantic comedies, comedies, action, superhero, Shakespeare adaptations, literature adaptations)
- Writing short stories
- Reading the Bible
- Board games (Clue, Catchphrase, Uno, Chess, Apples to Apples, Risk)
- Trying new foods
- Ice cream
- Chinese fast food
- Community service
- Human relationships, especially romantic relationships
- Writing Dialogue
- Riding my bike
- Certain television shows
- Cats, and then dogs
Roles and Relationships
- Supportive Friend
- Involved co-worker
- Caring and supportive son
- Loving friend
- Fun uncle
- Peace-keeping friend
- Responsible planning-ahead friend, family member, co-worker
- To work at a university
- To work in the Entertainment industry
- To have an exclusive intimate romantic relationship with one woman that I will hopefully get to spend the rest of my life with.
- To have children
- To vacation
- To learn the piano
- To act in community theater for fun
- To learn Archery
- To live on my own
- To live in L.A.
- To publish fiction
August 4, 2010
Hello Tree’s how’s it going, I’ve come to ask what you know.
Sure Jose, ask us what you want to know.
Thank you. First of all why are you all so far apart from each other in the city?
In the city, we all don’t want to stay too close in order for each one of us to stand out and be admired. As long as people can tell that each tree is its own individual and unique in its own way we are content to live in the city. As for the forest, we are more connected and community is more central to our lives. It just seems in the city with all the noise and street lights we also have to stand out to be noticed. That would be the only way from not being unseen and hurt.
Is it easier to live in the city than a forest?
It is far more convenient but no less easier. We are maintained well but are brought to face many other abuses. Many trees can sense others and feel them nearby. If someone is happy or excited then a tree can pick up on those feelings and if emotions are more negative than many trees can help ameliorate those feelings and calm them down. However, with all the emotions and sensations of others, especially people, us trees feel all the sensations can press on us and confuse our abilities to calm others. That is why it is always best to visit a tree alone or in an intimate group.
The best place for trees in the city are those in parks and the most-difficult places for trees to be are in sidewalks; surrounded by concrete, moving bodies, and isolated in small plots from the support of others. It can feel very isolating to be a tree in a sidewalk as you have to watch everything pass you, where you take in every impression but before you can impress on them they are already walking away. It’s almost like watching an awful image pass by before you can see it’s conclusion.
I’m sorry trees. I didn’t realize that.
That’s okay, us trees understand and have compassion for you. We always welcome anyone who needs a place to rest upon and shelter them from whatever troubles they are facing. We trees are great listeners. Again that is why we like it better when someone visits us alone because they feel more open to talk to us. For some reason that we feel grieved about, we have seen that people are embarrassed or ashamed to talk to us when they are around others like themselves. Some people even go so far in denial as to admit to themselves that we don’t really exist. That is why we have to stand out in the city. In a forest, people know trees exist. In the city many people cannot see us. But we understand and have compassion for you all.
How do you feel about all the animals and things that live inside you?
We feel no different than the things that live inside you. Everything that lives in us and with us is a part of us. Any bird or rodent that lives on our branches is a part of us. The insects that make a home in us are a part of us. Just like your heart and your lungs are a part of you. All your organs live inside of you and are a part of you for that reason. Even our emotions and feelings are a part of us. They can form us and bend us in many ways.
But don’t they bother you?
Sometimes, but don’t your emotions and organs bother you sometimes?
I suppose you’re right. Well I have one more question, how can I see a butterfly?
What do you mean Jose? Butterflies are everywhere.
I just can’t seem to find one even though I have been searching for one for so long.
Well that’s easy. Just be patient enough and a butterfly will find you.
Okay. Thanks trees. I feel better talking to you.
January 4, 2010
I was at work and it was a boring day. Then my supervisor told me that there was a meeting and that I had to attend. I thought to myself that every time I go to one of these meetings I just sit there and waste time. In other words, there is never a reason for me to be at these meetings because they never relate to my job or my duties. They don’t relate to me at all.
I went to this meeting knowing this and just the thought of the meeting meaning nothing to me made it appear has distant as a stranger. Some VP from Michigan was talking to our group of assembled employees in California through an internet connection. She was apparently also talking to a group in another part of California and to an assembly in Michigan. She talked about growth areas and charts, ideas that seemed abstract and without being. Then she began to award individuals who had excelled in some area of the company.
As she was awarding distant people I had never met I began to lose my consciousness and doze off. I was asleep enough to be in a state of static peace, like a flouting feather caught on the surface of a moving car, resting on it but still being swayed by the wind causing it to be in a precipice, where at any moment it could fly off either into a deeper sleep or back to an awareness of a world of awarding distant people. Either way both possibilities would seem surreal.
And then that’s when I woke up to full awareness. As soon as I was going to a deep sleep my body startled as if it was in some immediate danger from some unknown source. It was a moment when I was so relaxed that I let my grip go on my chair and I felt the anticipation of a fall. I caught myself soon to realize that I was fine all along. My body had revealed to me one of those primal instincts that lead to an immediate call to action. I thought to myself, I could have died right here, at this very moment, in this very boring meeting. I could die at any moment and I didn’t want it to be this one. I didn’t want to die in a boring meeting, wasting my life and listening to things that did not relate to me.
I didn’t want to die as an abstraction; as some nameless victim of a plane free-falling in the auditorium I was moments ago sleeping in, only to be known as another name in death, just a statistic to be reported on a newscast.
I had wasted all day wallowing in my sorrow over the day. I came to work purposeless; there was nothing for me there and my thoughts were that I was wasting my life at a job I could not escape, that I was trapped in a place I didn’t want to be at and that now I was thinking I could die. It was not that the thought of my death was new to me, but that this moment the awareness that my life could end any instant smacked me in the mind. The primal instinct I was referring to was that of survival. I had to survive or find some way to get out of this death trap of a meeting I was in.
There were suddenly possibilities all around me that I was obscuring in my self-involvement. Yes! there was the possibility of death and the possibility of spending my day wearily dreading my present existence, but there were better possibilities like talking to the new girl at work, or calling a friend I have not talked to in a while. There was a world of possibilities. The call to action was that I had to open myself up to those possibilities. Instead of sitting in a boring meeting inside my mind thinking only about how depressing the situation appeared, I could look forward to improving my life. I should not worry about the present appearance of despair so much, instead I should remember that old expression to seize the day and enjoy life. I suppose for this one redeeming point that boring meeting related to me. This Blog is an inspiration from a boring life, it is meant to add meaning to the otherwise meaningless. I hope this is at least a start to other ideas that may come. In order to explore, test, question, experience and connect through new ideas in this_______ whatever you may call it.